Home > General, Markets > For want of a Swiss Army Knife, Lehman was lost

For want of a Swiss Army Knife, Lehman was lost

March 26, 2009

83071615DB011_JOBS_CULL_IN_After months of tense negotiations, Lehman Brother’s Bankruptcy Trustree and Barclays Bank settled a bitter ownership dispute about golf balls.

Bloomberg News reports that thousands of Lehman logo knicknacks were mistakenly transferred to Barclays in the firesale of Lehman’s brokerage unit. They will now be returned to their rightful owner for “liquidation.”

The inventory included:
1,630 Green canvas duffle bags with “Lehman Green Ribbon.”
353 Green compact golf umbrellas.
75 Waterford crystal clocks.
682 White Lehman coffee mugs.
130 Swiss Army pens.
1 English beechwood-lined sterling silver box from 1902.
200 Lehman conference pens.
12 Pairs of Links of London cufflinks.
24 Screwpull corkscrews labeled “LB”.
24 Titleist PRO VI golf balls labeled “LB”.
30 Girl Teddy bears.
18 Large women’s F&G stretch snap shirts
1 Tiffany shooting star.

After surveying this treasure trove, Rocky finally understands why Lehman went down the drain.

No competent management buys Swiss Army Pens. If Dick Fuld had instead bought “One-Handed-ParachutistSwiss Army Knives, Lehman would still be alive today.

[Disclosure: Rocky owns no Ebay stock, but was briefly tempted to buy some: Most of these knicknacks will find their final resting place in Ebay auctions… probably without any bidders.]

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  1. masteroftheuniverse
    March 26, 2009 at 9:33 pm

    Rocky,

    One benefit of e-Bay is that it establishes a “street price” for stuff I might be interested in buying or selling.

    I Love e-Bay, and spend way too much money on crap. One can find great deals at http://woot.com, and I swear by them. I buy way too much stuff there also.

    Jeff

  2. allocator
    March 26, 2009 at 10:34 pm

    Or … Swiss Army beer can holders. Note that the Redneck Bank is still solvent.

    And the duffle bugs would have been for – the bonuses?

    Cheers,
    G

  3. March 27, 2009 at 7:29 am

    Jeff:
    So YOU are the guy who always out-bids Rocky for Plastic Flowers … just as the auction is ending.

    George:
    Yes, the duffle bags are useful for moving large amounts of cash. Rumor has it that there are very few spare Madoff Investment Securities duffle bags available … at this time.

  4. Russell Pierce
    March 27, 2009 at 11:24 am

    Rocky,

    This stuff only has worth if your initials are “LB.” If they can find a good engraver, maybe somebody at LL Bean would like something, or at the Johnson Library in Texas.

    Yarnman

  5. March 27, 2009 at 11:26 am

    Yarnman:
    Absolutely brilliant idea!
    When Rocky gets home this evening, he’ll suggest that Trophy Wife change her name to Lolita Beatrice. Then Rocky will know the perfect anniversary gifts … for the next 50 years.

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