An inconvenient truth about lightbulbs

Trophy Wife asked Rocky to replace a dozen burned-out lightbulbs in their home.

A routine request, except that Rocky replaced all of their old incandescent bulbs with new, expensive, energy-efficient compact fluorescent bulbs 24 days ago! (Rocky’s massive bulb-change was in celebration of the wildly succesful Boost-The-Economy-Buy-A-Lightbulb-Day.)

Was this mass bulb burnout an innocent quality control failure? Or was it more sinister? (Perhaps a conspiracy to shorten Rocky’s life using tall ladders and electricity?)

Rocky naively believes that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. And that Princess Diana’s death was just an accident. Not surprisingly, Rocky is skeptical that the Mob “put out a hit” on him (via faulty lightbulbs). Today’s New York Times bolstered Rocky’s non-conspirarcy-theory theory with a story about widespread lightbulb quality control problems. (Click on: “Do New Bulbs Save Energy If They Don’t Work”)

“Some experts … blame the government for the quality problems, saying an intensive federal push to lower the price essentially backfired by encouraging manufacturers to use cheap components,” reports the NY Times.

“Ah,” Rocky thought, “It’s ALWAYS the government’s fault.”

Since the new bulbs are more expensive than incandescents, consume energy to manufacture, and disperse toxic mercury during disposal, it begs the timeless question: “How many people does it take to change their opinion about the efficiency of a compact fluorescent lightbulb?”

Rocky’s readers are invited to share their lightbulb experiences in this poll:

Boost the economy, buy a light bulb

Rocky shares the following letter, which is partly based on Keynesian economic principles articulated in the Broken Window Parable of Frederic Bastiat from an 1850 essay:

Dear Fellow American:

Almost ten percent of us are unemployed, and the economy is a mess. The ninety percent of us that still have a job are scared, and we read about the government borrowing and spending trillions of dollars as a “stimulus” to the economy. That debt will either be a burden to our children, or it will be wiped out by an inflation that destroys the value of our savings even more.

We can do something that is good for us, good for the economy and good for our children. Buy a lightbulb! Buy a toothbrush! Buy some laundry detergent!

This is not a joke. Please allow me to explain.

We all use some of the following:
1. Lightbulbs
2. Toothpaste / toothbrush
3. Laundry detergent, soap, shampoo.
4. Razors, shaving cream
5. Plastic bags, aluminum foil
6. Kitchen glassware, forks, knives
7. Canned tuna, canned coffee
8. Batteries
9. Paperclips, staples, paper, pens
10. Blank computer CD’s

The money in our savings accounts are not earning any interest. So let’s spend some money on these things since we know that we will need them. Since they don’t ever spoil, let’s buy them NOW. Let’s buy enough so that we won’t need to buy more for the next year or two or three.

If every working American stocks up, there will be an immediate benefit to the economy. Factories that make them will stay open. Jobs will be saved. And if prices rise (which they probably will) over the next year or two, we will have saved money too. If you can find these items Made in America, even better. But it doesn’t really matter. We live in a global economy, and what’s good for the world is good for America.

March 1, 2009 is “Buy a light bulb day.” Please join us as we jump start the economy without the government’s involvement. Please share this message with your friends, family and co-workers.

Thank you for your time.

Brought to you by “BALBOA”
( Buy-A-Light-Bulb, Boost-America )